3/12/25

Reading Time: 3 Minutes

Things won’t change.

At least, that’s what we tell ourselves.

But the reality is, they do.

That belief—the idea that we’re stuck, that nothing will ever be different—is a story we create. And once that story takes hold, we act as if it’s true.

How many times have you let a thought dictate your actions without ever questioning it? Maybe you assumed someone was talking about you behind your back, and suddenly, you’re giving them the cold shoulder. Or you believed you weren’t good enough at something, so you stopped trying.

Welcome to Self-Sabotage 101—where the stories we tell ourselves become the walls that hold us back.

The Danger of Unquestioned Narratives

We carry these internal scripts everywhere. They shape how we interact with others, how we see ourselves, and ultimately, how we move through the world.

Ever thought you weren’t worth someone’s time? That story might make you pull away from meaningful relationships.
Ever convinced yourself that you’ll always fail? That story might keep you from taking a risk that could change your life.

These narratives are poisonous thoughts—and they keep us stuck.

Taking Things for Granted

One of the biggest blind spots we have is not realizing what we already have—until it’s gone.

Before COVID, we took our routines, friendships, and even simple freedoms for granted. Then, everything changed, and we saw how fragile our normalcy really was. The same thing happens in relationships. We assume people will always be there, that they’ll always understand, that we can treat them however we want and it’ll be fine.

But that’s not how it works.

Think about the last time you felt hurt by someone. Did they actually mean to hurt you, or was it just the story you told yourself?

Replace Judgment with Curiosity

What if, instead of assuming the worst, we got curious?

Curiosity doesn’t kill the cat—it builds understanding.

The next time you hear something about someone, don’t jump to conclusions. Ask. Instead of assuming they meant to hurt you, talk to them. Instead of believing the worst about yourself, challenge that thought.

Because here’s the truth: your thoughts aren’t facts.

Changing The Story Starts Now

You are not trapped. You are not defined by the worst thing that’s ever happened to you, the biggest mistake you’ve made, or the fears that whisper, nothing will change.

Because things do change.

The question is—will you let them?

Will you challenge the stories that hold you back? Will you trade assumptions for curiosity, self-doubt for possibility? Will you recognize that your struggles are not roadblocks, but signposts guiding you toward growth?

Your story isn’t over. You have the power to rewrite it.

And it starts with a simple decision: believing that change is possible.

5 Ways to Rewrite the Stories You Tell Yourself

1. Challenge Your Thoughts – When a negative thought pops into your head (“I’ll never be good enough” or “They don’t like me”), ask yourself: Is this actually true, or is it just a story I’m telling myself? Evidence usually proves these thoughts wrong.
2. Replace Judgment with Curiosity – Instead of assuming the worst about a situation or person, get curious. Ask questions, seek clarity, and approach people with understanding instead of assumptions. It can transform relationships and prevent unnecessary conflict.
3. Recognize What You Take for Granted – Think about the people and opportunities in your life that you assume will always be there. Express gratitude, show appreciation, and nurture those relationships. Small moments of gratitude lead to deeper connections.
4. Give Yourself Permission to Grow – Your past mistakes, struggles, or failures do not define you.
5. Every day is a new page in your story—so write it with intention. Let go of the old narrative and step into the possibility of change.

Your story is still being written.